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Over breakfast my partner announced he is falling in love with another woman. I said, “What?” The omelettes had turned out so well. It was a cool, greyish day. I had asked why he kept heaving huge sighs. For a long time I could say just nothing. Then I asked a question, how can this […]

4

I found a bar lit solely by candles. To get there I had to pass twenty-five Christmas trees, laid out to die on the stones. A wax-stick notice scribbled in the window of a nearby cafe said, Be at least epic. I found a bar I liked and it took me two passes to work […]

22

I was seeing this guy once who got comfortable enough to start flossing in front of me, thus revealing his ingenious method: he’d extract the string of floss periodically and holding it still taut between his fingers, sniff at it. Possibly the most repulsive act I’ve ever seen in my life & I could never […]

11

First date in a cafe. “They always play such excellent jazz here,” he is saying. “Try the cakes, they’re always good.” “Right,” the girl says lightly. He has over-ordered, wanting to induct her into his routines. “I think heaven must be an eternal breakfast,” he says. The girl is drinking coffee as though it were […]